(Why Doesn’t God Care?) Question and Answer.
“Why do we pray when the only answer we get from God is, ‘NO’? It seems He only cares about certain people and they receive everything. Sometimes I feel there is no use in praying or work at being a Christian. The Lord does not love us. I feel very lost and confused.”
I can tell how confused you feel. It is hard to look to God for certain responses and then not receive them. However, Jesus understands this. Three times He prayed, “Abba! Father! All things are possible for You; remove this cup from Me; yet not what I will, but what You will” (Mark 14:36; New American Standard Bible). Jesus was greatly distressed as He prayed these prayers (Mark 14:34).
The hardest truth is that sometimes God’s will can only be accomplished by saying “No” to what we ask. The only way humanity could be saved was through the death of Jesus. God would not change His mind in that case. Jesus understands your struggle and confusion. He too struggled and had to hear God say “no” to His request.
What this means to you is to look further for the will of God. He may be accomplishing something through you and your circumstances that will only become clear with time. Trust God, that if He is in fact saying “No” to you, you can discover how He will use this to do what He wants done.
Does God love some more than others? “He causes His sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous” (Matthew 5:45). God is completely just and fair. But, in His fairness He knows what we need and what is best for us. So some receive blessings others do not receive. This is not out of preference but out of wisdom.
Let’s say a father trusts his son to be prompt and on time every time because his son has always been a time-conscience child. However, his daughter needs a strict curfew to insure that she is home on time. Is the father unfair in not having a curfew for one and insisting on one for the other? Not at all, since one is different from the other. Assume the father and mother instilled the same values in both children. There are many instances where the two children were treated differently due to their different natures and temperament.
God does the same. Some of us do not need the things we pray for. God knows (just as a good parent) what His children can handle and what they cannot. God knows some of His children can handle some things better than others of His children. This is not preferential treatment but wisdom used by Him to discipline and train us.
In the example I gave above, the parents love both of their children. They could not and would not try to choose between them. The children are equally theirs. Equally loved and equally respected by their parents. But in raising them, they were treated differently due to their different personalities and behavioral tendencies.
This explains why God might give some what He does not give to others. God is not a candy machine that gives out whatever gifts we ask. Like most parents, He looks beyond the request to the real need of His child. A child seldom grasps what the real need is but a good parent looks deeper. God does that.
As to God loving you, there can be no doubt. “For God so loved the world, that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish, but have eternal life” (John 3:16).
Right now you can not feel His love but His love is there for you nevertheless. Satan wants to convince you that you are not loved by God. But this is a hateful and disgusting lie. God does loves you. The fact that Jesus died for you is proof enough of this. The fact that God (in His wisdom and providence) does not give you everything you ask of Him, in no way negates the love He has for you.
The daughter above knew love because her parents cared enough to enforce a curfew. The son experienced love because his parents trusted him enough not to worry about a curfew. God is a better a parent than these parents could ever be. Trust Him. He loves you. Seek His will, even if He says “no”.